Petless Pal

Dear Blackie:

I really like animals but I can't get a cat because then my best pal won't come see me because she's allergic to feline dander. I can't get a dog because my landlord won't allow dogs. So basically, I think I might have to invest in some tropical fish but fish are gross and some of them
are even assholes. You know, the ones with the teeth and shit? My question is: did you really have a pet rabbit?

Signed,

Petless Pal

Dear Petless,

Yes I have had several pet rabbits. They are wonderful pets. They are very cat-like in that they are curious beings and very independent. They can be trained to use a litterbox.
People who are usually allergic to animals are very seldom allergic to rabbits as they don't produce dander. They are kerpuscular and very cute when they play.

If you want to pursue getting a pet rabbit, I can tell you that the best breed for pet rabbits is a Dutch, that is the black with a white stripe. The alibinos are assholes, they chew and are not friendly. The lop ears are cute also, but they are not as good pets as the Dutch. You have to get the rabbit when it is young and train it. If you are going to keep it in a cage, don't get one, get a chia pet instead. If you are willing to house train it and let it sit on your lap, you will enjoy it as a pet. Some rabbits chew wood--like baseboards-- and some chew electrical cords. You have to provide it with good things to chew on just as you would a puppy who chews. You also have to feed them papaya tablets as they tend to get hairballs. Now go jump down a hole,

Blackie